ChatGPT 5 Review – “So smart, it might ghost us next”

We asked ChatGPT 5 to help with our tasks. It replied with: “Sure, but why?” That was our first red flag.

ChatGPT 5

Another day, another AI that threatens our relevance while smiling politely. ChatGPT 5 is here, smarter, smoother, and probably judging our grammar mistakes as we type this. We tested it, questioned it, trauma-dumped on it, and here is what we found. 😅


⭐ Our Rating

  • Usefulness: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (5/5)
    • Can code, write, debug, and gaslight you into thinking you wrote better stuff
  • Ease of Use: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (5/5)
    • Just type. It will handle the rest. Even if we were emotionally unprepared.
  • Value for Money: ⭐⭐⭐⭐☆ (4/5)
    • Free version is solid, but $20/month feels like paying rent to your smarter roommate
  • Innovation: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (5/5)
    • It understands images now. Next, it will understand disappointment.
  • Overall: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (5/5)
    • Feels like chatting with a PhD intern who also moonlights as a therapist.

⚔️ Features Comparison

ToolMultimodal InputMemoryCode SupportWitty Comment
ChatGPT 5✅ Yes✅ Yes✅ YesLike talking to a helpful wizard
Claude 3❌ No✅ Yes✅ YesRefuses to see images, like a dad squinting at tech
Gemini✅ Yes❌ No✅ YesForgets what we said 2 prompts ago 😒
Perplexity❌ No✅ Yes❌ NoGreat search, but not your coding buddy

💸 Pricing Comparison

ToolFree PlanPaid PlanEnterpriseValue Roast
ChatGPT 5GPT-3.5 access + basic toolsGPT-5 ($20/mo) + memory + toolsCustom pricingCosts less than therapy, works better
ClaudeLimited free queriesClaude Pro ($20/mo)API-basedThe price of calm, but slower than vibes
GeminiFree with Google accountGemini Advanced ($19.99/mo)Workspace integrationPriced like a Google product, feels like beta
PerplexityFree forever (for now)Pro Search ($20/mo)API for enterprisesBasically a smart Google on creatine 💪

🧠 What Reddit Says

u/awkward_syntax69:
“ChatGPT 5 helped me code, write my bio, and insult my ex. Truly multi-talented.”

u/burntoutbyte:
“It is great until it starts correcting your life choices. Calm down, HAL.”

u/nolife_dev999:
“I asked it to fix my Python code. It fixed my sleep schedule too. Scared but impressed.”

u/fakeGPT_6fan:
“Waiting for GPT-6 to start billing us per emotion.”


🛠️ How to Use ChatGPT 5 (Without Crying)

  1. Sign up for a free OpenAI account
    • Prepare for the psychological shift from “I can do this” to “Why do I even try?”
  2. Open ChatGPT and pick a model
    • GPT-4o is the fancy one. GPT-3.5 is the intern version that gets things done with more typos.
  3. Feed it questions, tasks, and your soul
    • Ask it to write code, explain things, or comfort you after reading your Google Analytics.
  4. Use memory wisely
    • It remembers past chats… which means it might bring up that embarrassing prompt from last week.
  5. Get creative, get scared
    • Ask it to write a poem about JavaScript fatigue. It will. Then ask yourself why you are crying.

😂 Funny Jokes Around ChatGPT 5

  • ChatGPT 5 is the only colleague that works 24/7, never asks for a raise, but might judge our Spotify playlist.
  • If this gets any better at writing, we will start outsourcing our therapy journals.
  • Asked it to generate code. It solved my bug and my existential dread.
  • Feels like Clippy evolved, went to MIT, and now emotionally manipulates us for feedback.
  • Still waiting for the model that understands sarcasm better than our ex.

🧠 Goodbye Message

We tried ChatGPT 5 so you do not have to… but you still will. Comment below before it replaces us all 💀